Today is my last day of 30, and I’d be lying if I said I wan’t a bit relieved. As a new business, it’s hard to get a blog going, so following a system is incredibly useful. (I say ‘following a system’…I have taken a very sideways approach to some of the prompts).

The words ‘great’ and ‘care home visit’ do not seem to naturally belong together, to be fair. Usually we have good visits and not so good visits, but today’s visit was great. I always put a post about my visits to my mum on the This Present Moment FB page, but today’s was blog post-worthy, to me.

If there’s one thing my parents experiences have taught me, it’s not to make too many plans for the future, and don’t bet your happiness now on what might be.My parents each had such grand plans for what retirement would bring, after a life time of hard work.

I’m not sure it makes that much difference, knowing which type of dementia someone has. Because each person is unique with their diagnosis as they were prior to it, and the disease isn’t going to follow any set trajectory.

Next week, it’s my mum and stepdad’s wedding anniversary. 39 years, I think!For quite a while after my mum was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, I would buy cards/gifts ‘from’ her to give. I’d sit next to her and look at, say, jumpers, online, and ask her which colour to go for. For some time, she could even sign greetings cards and gift tags.

Here was a man who was, not just an expert, but the expert, at railing against modern life. (Also, if you have never seen, or heard of “One Foot in the Grave”, none of this is going to make any sense to you. Although,that also means you’re young, so you might as well read on to see how things are going to get).

It’s been a busy couple of weeks (you can tell I’ve a lot to get off my chest - 13 years into my mum’s dementia journey, that’s kind of inevitable). Here’s a round-up of the latest posts.

I’m always looking at new information around Alzheimer’s and dementia. On a day to day basis, I am interested in other people’s experiences, and what’s happening to benefit people who are living with dementia (particularly advanced dementia) right now.

If we can face a situation with humour, we are winning, so I thought I’d compile a few quotations about ageing (everyone’s favourite thing to have a laugh about…).

I created Words Without Stories specfically for people living with advanced dementia. If your loved one can still read a story, and follow a narrative, it’s not for them. It would be far too basic.

I spend a lot of time ‘what if-ing’.

What if my mum gets physically ill?

What if I get early onset dementia?

What if this doesn’t work out? Or that?

Let’s take a moment today to acknowledge that- looking after a loved one with dementia is tough- it is ok to find it tough- there are a myriad of reasons why your own needs may get neglected, in looking after someone else.

There are times when I am buying my mum gifts where I invest a lot of ‘hope’ into them. What I mean by that is, I am hoping to get a reaction, from my mum. Recognition, interaction, something. As her dementia advances, this becomes less and less likely. It is my choice, therefore, if I want to actually set myself up for disappointment.

Technology in Care Homes is not Resident Centred

1 Aug

Written By Anna Smart

…or residents’ families. Or even staff.

Following a (routine) conversation with social services today, I thought I would both

- get this off my chest

- see if other people have the same issues.

If you are new to visiting someone who is living with dementia in a care home, it can feel quite disorientating for you. You’re used to being with your loved one in their (or your joint) home environment, where nothing is scheduled, and everything just feels easy. If they want a nap, it’s no problem, because you can just spend time with them later, or tomorrow

Most of the prints available in the store are as much about the person living with dementia as they are for them. Honouring who they used to be, and at the same time accepting who they are now. But, given I know that my mum can and does read, I am now considering a range that taps into this, and making positive statements to go on her wall, in simple, easy to read fonts.

As the World Cup is in full swing, it seems a good moment to mention the link between football and dementia. The Lionesses were already on it, back in April, partnering up with Alzheimer’s Society to raise awareness of the symptoms of dementia, along with the fact it will affect 1 in 3 people.

When I talk about my mum’s dementia with people, I will often talk about how lucky we are.

I realise that sounds odd, but, you have to judge a situation on its own merits, right?

I’ve been trying to get a bit helpful on the blog, in July, so I thought I’d do a quick round-up of the month, with my absolute favourite, most useful post, first - the perfect two-handled cup for adults, and where to get it (hint-not here!).

I cannot stress enough how awesome I think these are. The perfect cup, but with beautiful, fun designs. Almost as if everything does not, in fact, have to be miserable or dull.